cleaning

As I unpack my bags and attempt to get myself oragnized I have stumbled accross an old journal. I like this entry.

August 24, 2006

It seems as if a spiritual death of sorts has occurred in the depths of my heart. The innocent and childlike faith that caused my heart and mind to be so easily influenced by the Spirit and nature of God has been replaced by a questioning mind and a jaded heart. Life which daily felt fueled by potential and possibility is deflated to no more than a cycle of days filled with things that must be accomplished.

I understand that daily life is as sacred as spiritual life and in fact there should be no separation between the two. But the thought of living the next 40 years in the mundane of getting by and doing what must be done is a thought that spirals my heart and mind to a depressed state. God has placed a thousand dreams in my heart for something different. Not better than the ordinary but far away from it. “There must be more than this”, is that anthem that haunts my mind throughout the day.

And there must be. And there is.