Wednesday, November 18, 2009
God defends the fatherless and the widow
"He defends the cause of the fatherless and the widow..." (Deuteronomy 10:18)
In the wake of heartache and tragedy, Abisoye has always remained optimistic and joyful. When I asked Abisoye - who likes to be called "Biso" for short - if she'd ever doubted God's love, she paused. Then she casually replied, "No, not really." Thirteen years ago, shortly after the birth of her first daughter, Biso's difficulties began. She noticed a small swelling on her tooth which slowly grew into a facial tumor. As it became noticeable, she was made an object of ridicule and scorn. "Some people thought I had HIV and that the tumor was contagious. It was hard for me to find employment, and people wouldn't invite me to parties," said Biso. "Even my sisters would not be part of me anymore. Sometimes they could be kind, but they were not proud that I was their sister. They didn't like introducing me to others as their sister."
Five years ago, her husband was shot in the chest while serving in the Nigerian Navy. Surgery to remove the bullet was expensive - more than they could afford. He recovered from his injury, but the bullet was never removed.
A year ago, Biso's husband died suddenly. The bullet had affected his heart, causing him to experience sudden "heart failure." It was a devastating loss - she still cannot talk about him without crying. "I saw him dying, and I couldn't help him. I didn't know he was going to die. I wish I had known," she said.
Today, Biso is the single mother of four children - two boys and two girls, ranging in age from three to thirteen. When her husband died, she and her children were promptly evicted from Navy housing. Surviving in her homeland, Nigeria, has become a daily struggle. Biso and her children are self-described squatters, having no home or property. The oldest daughter lives with an aunt, while Biso and the other children stay with her mother. "We used to live in a nice house, but now we don't have a home. We squat and are living with my mom. The apartment is very small, and it is not very comfortable," said Biso. A college-educated woman, Biso previously held a job as an accountant. However, because of her tumor, no one will hire her. She has started baking and selling bread to support her family.
As she grieved the loss of her husband, Biso became increasingly frightened and worried about the tumor. "When I would feel the tumor in my body, sometimes it was really painful. I read a book that said it could go to your brain, damage it, and kill you. I was so scared when I read that. Who would take care of my children if I died?" At that time, her six-year-old son, Donald, developed a bony lesion on his head. The lesion needed to be surgically removed. They both needed surgeries she could not afford. Biso began to fervently pray, asking God to provide for them. One day, her pastor received news that the Africa Mercy was coming to the neighboring country of Benin. A church member sent photos of Biso and Donald to the ship. After being reviewed by the medical staff, both were scheduled for surgery. "When they said they could help, I was so excited. I thought, 'At last the Lord is doing it!'" said Biso. Soon after, Biso and Donald traveled to the Africa Mercy. They were placed in neighboring beds onboard the hospital ship. The next day, within hours of each other, they received free surgeries. It took Biso more than a week to recover. During that time, she was a great encouragement to those around her.
"Abisoye was a light when you came to the ward," said ward nurse Katelyn Billings. "She always had a positive attitude and was very encouraging. Her faith really impressed me. After all she'd been through in her life, the many struggles and challenges, still the first thing she would say to you was, 'God is so good.' Considering everything she has been through, it is pretty amazing that she can still say that." Wanting to share her experiences on the Africa Mercy with her community in Nigeria, Biso kept pen and paper at her bedside. Whenever she had a "memorable" experience, she wrote it down. Before leaving, she compiled a list more than three pages long. Hoping to gain supporters for Mercy Ships, Biso will use this list to write a story about the Africa Mercy. Biso doesn't have the words to express how grateful she is. "What can I say that will express what I feel? I feel like I have had spiritual heart surgery - everyone has been so kind and loving. This is a special group of people. I have been so inspired by everyone. Keep up the good work." As Biso returns to Nigeria, there are many unknowns. But one thing she is certain of is God's faithfulness to provide for the needs of her family. God has used Mercy Ships to demonstrate this to her. She says with great sincerity, "I am so happy. He has a special place in His heart for the widows and fatherless. He has been taking care of us, and I can see it. God is wonderful."
Story and Photos by Megan Petock